Untitled 325

I kept meaning to post this last week, but I never got around to it. Then when I finally did on Friday, my webhost was temporarily down. Figures. Better late than never.

Ever save your AIM conversations? I save particularly funny ones. Recently I was reading through some of them and came across this one I had with Jeeves back on May 9th, 2002. It's classic. Reprinted without permission:

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gRegorThe1

:I can't believe they don't have A-Team bank checks
Jeeves

:I know! I was thinking about that the other day.
gRegorThe1

: Dude!
gRegorThe1

: I found Brady Bunch checks.. but that's not the same
gRegorThe1

: maybe I'll get Simpsons checks
gRegorThe1

: I want something cool. Simpsons are, but I hardly watch the show.
gRegorThe1

: Ooh, Southpark checks. haha no.
Jeeves

:A-team is cooler.
gRegorThe1

: women design checks
gRegorThe1

: .. because there are barely ANY cool checks.
Jeeves

:Totally. BANK worker women.
Jeeves

:That's like... elementary skuul teachers making checks.
gRegorThe1

:
there's also barely ANY cool chicks.

coincidence?
gRegorThe1

: whoa; deep thought.
Jeeves

:That is deep... and frightening.
gRegorThe1

: heh heh
Jeeves

:Why are chicks...I mean, why can't chicks be... why do we have to... you know what I mean. Something is really wrong with chicks. Can't live with them, can't kill them.
gRegorThe1

: heh heh
gRegorThe1

:
"women, can't live with 'em --
hey, are those beer nuts?" - JP
Jeeves

:hahah, exactly.
gRegorThe1

: oooh, teddy bear checks!
gRegorThe1

: Happy Days checks!
Jeeves

:Crap.
gRegorThe1

: HA
gRegorThe1

: or The Munsters
gRegorThe1

: Or Muppets
Jeeves

:Some bank lady needs to be slapped so hard that she spins around for that one.
gRegorThe1

: hmm
gRegorThe1

: what do you think of those 3?
gRegorThe1

: I dig the muppets
gRegorThe1

: Kermit, Fozzy, Piggy, and Animal
Jeeves

:I would then shake my fists at her, filled with teddy bear checks, give her the panicked eyes, coupled with the sweaty forehead, and - between my clenched teeth - mumble something like, "so and so WOMAN! *grumble grumble* TEDDY BEARS... *grumble grumble* A-TEAM! AAA - TEEEAAAM!"
Jeeves

:"GET IT RIGHT!"
gRegorThe1

: hahah
gRegorThe1

: ok, ok.. calm down.
gRegorThe1

: I know, I know.
gRegorThe1

: Kelloggs checks? what?!
gRegorThe1

: tony the tiger.. rice krispy munchkins..
Jeeves

:Hahah. Apparently, some second-rate ROOSTER mascot gets checks... but not Mr. T?
gRegorThe1

: Im thinking the Muppets is the coolest one I've seen yet
Jeeves

:Yeah. And even THEY're cute and cuddly.
gRegorThe1

: not animal
Jeeves

:Yes. Even animal.
gRegorThe1

: dude, are you dissin' muppets?
Jeeves

:Yes.
gRegorThe1

: That's it.
gRegorThe1

: outside. now.
Jeeves

:I AM outside. Now.
gRegorThe1

: well GOOD!
Jeeves

:GREAT!
gRegorThe1

: stay there! yeah.
gRegorThe1

: FINE!
Jeeves

:WONDERFUL!
gRegorThe1

: AMAZING!
Jeeves

:WHOOPADEE FRICKIN' DOO!
gRegorThe1

: SUPERCALAFRJALISTICEXPEALADOCIOUS!
Jeeves

:WOO!
gRegorThe1

: BOOM BABY!
gRegorThe1

: hahah
Jeeves

:YOU SPELLED IT WRONG YOU FREAK!
gRegorThe1

: I'll spell YUO wrong YUO FREAK!
Jeeves

:Ohhh... somebody wants it. BAD.
gRegorThe1

: Ohhh... the big bad man is threatening me, mommy.
Jeeves

:I will save my vengeance until I arrive in Indy.
gRegorThe1

: Ooooooooh
Jeeves

:That's right. Just you wait.
gRegorThe1

: I'm soooo scared
Jeeves

:I know.
gRegorThe1

: Just remember it's MY floor you'll be sleeping on.
I wouldn't fall asleep if I were you.
Jeeves

:I wasn't planning on it anyway.
Jeeves

:I was going to stand over you and stare at you, while you slept.
gRegorThe1

: dude, you're weird.
Jeeves

:...watching your eyes twitch through your eyelids as you dream about chicks and checks... and wait for the moment your eyes crack open to sock you in your jaw.
gRegorThe1

: hahaha
Jeeves

:Well... gotta jet, my whitey brutha.
gRegorThe1

: that's right, run away
gRegorThe1

: ..like a scared little girl.
Jeeves

:I shall... and show you how to do it right, for when it's YOUR turn! MOOHOOHAHAH!
Jeeves

:heeheehee! *giggle, giggle, giggle, run, run, run*
gRegorThe1

: later
gRegorThe1

: haha
Jeeves

:PFFFTH!

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Speaking of Jeeves, the guy owes me an email. *cough*